Written by scott on June 13th, 2013

Seriously?Our semi-regular round-up of the crazy (and often unintentionally hilarious) things that anti-gay folks are saying about marriage equality and the LGBT community.

Today, will start in the United States with the National Organization for Marriage, which makes the astonishing claim that banning gay marriage really bans nothing. Think Progress reports:

Note first that, however the debate about redefining marriage is resolved, two men or two women will still be free to live together, with or without a sexual relationship or a wedding ceremony. (None of this is true, for example, of bigamy or polygamy — crimes rightly punishable by imprisonment.) The debate about same-sex civil marriage is not about anyone’s private behavior, but about legal recognition. The decision to honor conjugal marriage bans nothing.

So that whole being treated on equal under the law thing – you guys are just imagining that.

Seriously regular Mike Huckabee is back again, this time telling us how all his fears come true. Pink News reports:

The very thing that many people and I know CWA was a part of this, saying, this is why the legalization of same-sex marriage is going to be a much bigger issue than just saying we let people love whoever they want to love, that’s not the issue. Will it force businesses — of course everyone will say, oh no people still have their rights, but they don’t. And every fear that people had has in fact come true.

So all the Christians have been rounded up and put in jail for merely speaking out against marriage equality? Because that was one of their fears, if I recall correctly. Ditto for men marrying animals, cars, and trees – has there been an outbreak of arboreal matrimony that I’ve missed?

Mike Huckabee made news with another anti-gay quote this week as well. Let’s just say that it includes pretzels. Gay Star News reports:

“According to recent surveys, the kids who grow up in our evangelical churches do not really know the biblical definition of marriage, and that really does concern me. We need to be clear that, when holy matrimony is formed into an unholy pretzel, twisted into perversion – and when the military and the Boy Scouts become test labs for social experiments – we need to be very clear that, male and female, [God] created them.”

So is that an “unholy pretzel” as opposed to aholy pretzel stick? Gee I’m suddenly getting hungry…

Also in the USA, professional fighter Josh Thompson compared marriage equality to both polygamy and incest. The Bleacher Report has the details:

The latest to chime in is Josh Thomson, the former Strikeforce lightweight champion and recent addition to the UFC roster. On Wednesday, Thomson (20-5-1, 3-1 UFC) used his Twitter account to share his opinions on gay marriage, comparing the practice–apparently unfavorably–with polygamy.

Thompson also used his Facebook account to compared a marriage to incest:

“Should siblings be allowed to marry siblings? My point is, where do you draw the line? I personally don’t care who you marry but I also am smart enough to know that it opens a gateway to men/women trying to marry young kids, siblings marrying eachother and people having multiple husbands an wives…Equality doesn’t stop with gay marriage, it just starts with it. Blacks an whites getting married is nothing like this. So your okay with R. Kelly trying To marry lil girls? People trying to marry their brother or sister? Animals? Etc? Those people want the same exact thing, to be happy. Are you gonna tell them no?” has a new video hate clip from UK:”Gay marriage will increase straight adultery!”

Are you sick of these guys always using the same tired old arguments against marriage equality? Then do we have the game for you. Dot429 presents “homophobic bingo” – keep this card handy and fill it out whenever you’re reading “Seriously?” or stories on gay media in general. You’ll fill up your card in no time!

One way to keep up with the news without also keeping up your blood pressure (or your blood alcohol content) is with a nice game of Argument Bingo; all you need is your favorite current events source, a custom bingo board site, and a list of the same old tired arguments you’re sick of hearing.


Homophobic bingo


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